Holy tax accountant, batman!

endearinglycreepy:

Welcome to Fandom.

1.22 | Devil’s Trap

missveryvery:

same guy who said this

he’s my fucking hero

What You Crave vs What You Need
Chocolate: Raw nuts/seeds.
Oily/Fatty Snacks: Kale, leafy greens.
Soda/Carbonated Drinks: Actual, literal bubbles.
Chips/Salty Food: Topsoil.
Cookies: Freudian psychology.
Sweet Tea: A strong Southern gentleman to take care of you.
Pasta/Carbs: Pasta/Carbs.
Ice: The sweet release of death.
cheesecakelama:

opidiod:

wellversedinetiquettte:

What the fuck is wrong with this website

absolutely nothing

Its flawless

cheesecakelama:

opidiod:

wellversedinetiquettte:

What the fuck is wrong with this website

absolutely nothing

Its flawless

canaba:

Society towards bisexuals

Hannibal Lecter Lamenting the Death of Will Graham

Based on this {x} piece.

hellabitcoins:

ilovesmoothjazz1998:

hellabitcoins:

aliwav:

listen you boutta have the thickest smoodie of all time, where is your liquid? your ice? weak ass aesthetics, try again

smh they leave the strawberry tops on… might as well leave the gotdam banana peels on

hellabitcoins
u can eat strawberry tops… & recent studies are showing banana peels are healthy n nutritious for u:…. The turntables

n im sure the outside of a coconut is mad high in fiber but im not bout ta eat woodchips cause of no govermence scienticians

hellabitcoins:

ilovesmoothjazz1998:

hellabitcoins:

aliwav:

listen you boutta have the thickest smoodie of all time, where is your liquid? your ice? weak ass aesthetics, try again

smh they leave the strawberry tops on… might as well leave the gotdam banana peels on

hellabitcoins
u can eat strawberry tops… & recent studies are showing banana peels are healthy n nutritious for u:…. The turntables

n im sure the outside of a coconut is mad high in fiber but im not bout ta eat woodchips cause of no govermence scienticians

nado-the-knight-of-the-wind:

mark-pellegrino-is-my-king:

cute-little-princess:

ronweasley:

twinamericas:

221cbakerstreet:

aphotovici:

lil-banshee:

gaylienz:

eviljohnlock-shipper:

seaghdhasuil:



No, it’s fine. I didn’t need my heart.

Are we crying about a doodle of dinosaurs?

Yes

Welcome to Tumblr

Oh god it hurts why would you ever

The meteor was coming.
Oh, God, it was coming and she didn’t know what to do. Her son, her beautiful little son, pressed close to her side, craning his neck to look up at his Mother.
“Mummy, why is everyone moving? There’s plenty of food here.” He asked in his sweet, innocent voice.
“Because, my sweet, sometimes it is best that we move on. It is our way.” She replied, forcing the words past the lump in her throat.
“Oh,” Her son said, turning his gaze to the fiery rock in the sky that would spell their deaths out for them, “the old Triceratops told me it was cuzza that rock. He said the rock could hurt us real bad.” He continued, not understanding what he meant by those words in his innocence.
“Triceratops is being silly, he just wanted to tease you one more time before he left.” She lied, choking on her tears. Oh, God, he son, her lovely son, was going to die not understanding.
“Oh.”
She turned her face to the meteor- it was close now. It wouldn’t be long. Swinging her head around, she dropped her face to her sons and nuzzled him one last time. “Let’s play a game, yes? And then we’ll go join the others.” She suggested.
“Okay! What game shall we play, Mummy?”
“Let’s play pretend. We will imagine the sort of place we would like to move to, and when we open our eyes, that’s where we shall be.” 
“How do we play?”
One last look at the meteor- it was almost time.
“Close your eyes and imagine the place, and count to thirty out loud. Just like when we play Hide-and-Seek.” She curled herself around her son, both of them now laid on the beach.
“Ok, Mummy. 1, 2, 3, 4…”
She watched the meteor approach with sad eyes, and just before it hit land she turned her head, laying it and her neck over her son and bracing herself.
Her son had not yet said 30, but it was over.

what the fuck is wrong with you

WOW HOLY FUCK THANKS FOR SHITTING ALL OVER MY HEART


SOBBING

Wow what the fuck. I didn’t need this.

nado-the-knight-of-the-wind:

mark-pellegrino-is-my-king:

cute-little-princess:

ronweasley:

twinamericas:

221cbakerstreet:

aphotovici:

lil-banshee:

gaylienz:

eviljohnlock-shipper:

seaghdhasuil:

image

No, it’s fine. I didn’t need my heart.

Are we crying about a doodle of dinosaurs?

Yes

Welcome to Tumblr

Oh god it hurts why would you ever

The meteor was coming.

Oh, God, it was coming and she didn’t know what to do. Her son, her beautiful little son, pressed close to her side, craning his neck to look up at his Mother.

“Mummy, why is everyone moving? There’s plenty of food here.” He asked in his sweet, innocent voice.

“Because, my sweet, sometimes it is best that we move on. It is our way.” She replied, forcing the words past the lump in her throat.

“Oh,” Her son said, turning his gaze to the fiery rock in the sky that would spell their deaths out for them, “the old Triceratops told me it was cuzza that rock. He said the rock could hurt us real bad.” He continued, not understanding what he meant by those words in his innocence.

“Triceratops is being silly, he just wanted to tease you one more time before he left.” She lied, choking on her tears. Oh, God, he son, her lovely son, was going to die not understanding.

“Oh.”

She turned her face to the meteor- it was close now. It wouldn’t be long. Swinging her head around, she dropped her face to her sons and nuzzled him one last time. “Let’s play a game, yes? And then we’ll go join the others.” She suggested.

“Okay! What game shall we play, Mummy?”

“Let’s play pretend. We will imagine the sort of place we would like to move to, and when we open our eyes, that’s where we shall be.” 

“How do we play?”

One last look at the meteor- it was almost time.

“Close your eyes and imagine the place, and count to thirty out loud. Just like when we play Hide-and-Seek.” She curled herself around her son, both of them now laid on the beach.

“Ok, Mummy. 1, 2, 3, 4…”

She watched the meteor approach with sad eyes, and just before it hit land she turned her head, laying it and her neck over her son and bracing herself.

Her son had not yet said 30, but it was over.

what the fuck is wrong with you

WOW HOLY FUCK THANKS FOR SHITTING ALL OVER MY HEART

image

SOBBING

Wow what the fuck. I didn’t need this.

ihaveplentyoffiremyself:

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Trailer – “The Mockingjay Lives”

The reason women are turning you down for casual sex seems to be that, for one thing, a lot of you are calling them sluts afterward. Also, a lot of you aren’t bothering to try to be good in bed.

Terri Conley, professor of psychology and women’s studies at the University of Michigan ( link )

welp.

(via glimpseofgoldglitter)

image

cptsmallass:

Prep him.

nixxie-fic:

Beautiful photoshoot of the Harry Potter Cast - by Sarah Dunn - (x)

Happy September 1st, Folks - New term starts at Hogwarts! Which house would you like to be sorted into?